Morbius - 2022 - Bad Movie

Morbius (2022): Bad film review

Moribus is a terrible movie and here’s why:

You’d think after his awful performance in 2016’s “Suicide Squad”, Jared Leto would have got the memo. Stay the hell away from DC properties. Indeed, stay away from the whole super-hero genre entirely.

If I was ever to meet him, which is highly unlikely as I am a sweaty internet troll and he is a very rich handsome Hollywood star, I would have said:

Look dude, with the right script and director, you can actually put in a good performance, hell, you are an Academy Award Winner.

Jared Leto: Morbius (2022)
Look, Jared, I know times might be tough but you can do better than this schlock.

But no, here we are in 2022 and he’s still phoning it in, I don’t care if he thinks he’s the master of method acting, his performance is both dull and flat. That’s mainly due to the fact that the character is written dully and flatly. You can’t polish a turd and all that.

But we can’t place all the blame on Jared himself. Let’s break down why this movie truly sucks:

  • An IP based on a comic character no one but unhygienic basement-dwelling nerds give a shit about (yes, since you are a reader of this site, this probably includes you).
  • But for the rest of the world: no one cares.
  • Boring vampire shit. It’s been done: no one cares.

On top of Jared Leto’s terrible performance, the rest of the cast wasn’t much better. Matt Smith was at least hamming it up as much as he could. The other characters were so generic I didn’t even bother to look them up on IMDB.

The only exception is Jared Harris, who, given the right material, can be considered one of the best actors of his generation. The guy can act.

Yet here he gets almost no screentime and another flat, boring character, that brings nothing to the movie except to be knocked off so that we can all see how evil Matt Smith’s character is (sorry I’m not going to use character names, I’ve forgotten them and just don’t care).

Some very boring background exposition about sick kids and how it sucks to be a sick kid. Yeah, we get it. Being sick sucks. Bigger kids will bully you, and you will have repressed resentment and either turn into a mad genius anti-hero or a rich genius who wants to suck everyone’s blood.

So what about the plot?

Oh, it involves bats, vampirism, some such stuff, revenge etc. The general problem of getting super powers of a vampire and sucking blood so you don’t turn into a truly “evil” vampire. Wasn’t this shit out of style after Twilight?

This is the main problem with the movie: the script. It’s terrible. It manages to be both bland and uninspired and yet somehow doesn’t have the smarts to realize that it could have been so much more.

Look, if they’d taken the piss, realized just how bad this movie was and adapted thusly, it could have been a game-changer. Except everyone takes it so seriously. It doesn’t even have any of that Marvel MCU charm. It’s just plain boring and in a dark ’90s anti-hero-themed movie, boring is the last thing you want.

All in all, “Moribus” is a terrible movie and one that you should definitely avoid. But, if you’re a fan of terrible movies, then Moribus is a must-watch!